"It's a long story."

"It's a long story."

January 22, 2015

--Hi. I'm S.  I'm a divorced widow in-between jobs.  I raised three kids to adulthood.  As they grieved the loss of their father, it took a toll on my ability to keep a steady job.  So, that combined with some bad financial advice, I am currently homeless.  I hope to find permanent, full-time employment in Nashville and either a studio apartment or suitable roommates also.--

'S' wrote that.

We can all take a lesson from her kindness.

Before I talk about 'S,' my night-before experience:
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I ran into John outside of Nashville Street taco, post visiting with the employees to compliment Katie. John asked me to meet him by the river to soak in some sun...back to that in a second. Katie is an employee there. Katie sometimes takes fresh leftovers after her shift to people on the benches where I have been sleeping and I was lucky enough to be in the right spot at the right time. I was sitting and chatting with a couple guys around 1:00 am, just brainstorming a place where we could go hang. "There's got to be somewhere we can just build a dang fire and hang." 'D' and 'T' were freezing.  And they had some fresh words to describe this, I'll leave that out! They each have temporary employment and work early in the morning. They had been out drinking a little bit and didn't want to stay at the shelters. They were adamant about finding somewhere to just hang out, out of the wind and build a fire. Pretty cool dudes. I wish we had known a place close by to do that! Katie brought us a feast. I had fresh fried chicken fingers and a biscuit. Katie was honestly the first person this week that treated me/us just like we should be treated. She didn't simply say here's some food and leave. She spent time with us, asked questions, shared her story (we ALL have one!) and walked down the line of benches to see who needed the food the most. It was one of the most genuine acts of kindness I have come across. Note to self--be more like Katie.
After Katie left, the guys decided to go walking to stay warm and invited me to do the same. With a full belly I decided to call it a night. Woke up at about 3 or 4 to find 'T' asleep on the bench across from me! I was cold and he had half the coverings I did.
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We don't know someone's story unless we ask. Unless we listen. While I was sittin on the lawn with John; 'S' approached, said Hi and sat right beside me. This is something most people are uncomfortable with or might find weird or awkward. I am so thankful she is not one of those people. I'm almost ready to call this a 'Truth' in the homeless community. Everyone is willing and much more excited to learn your story. She wanted to know my story! Try putting yourself in my shoes for a second---not an easy thing for me to do out here. I am always torn about telling someone I actually have a car, nice apartment, family and friends everywhere, starting a company etc.. It would be much easier to throw out something else. And I'd be lying if I said I tell everyone the full truth right off the bat. I ease into.

'S' was special. A genuinely smart and caring person. In this instance I was able to share my story quickly, and she was so so supportive and even had a couple great ideas for us! After sharing, I reciprocated by asking her situation: She's educated. In her past she has held marketing jobs, ran a small print shop and has seen some success.Things got difficult fast and this is her first experience with homelessness. After the death of her husband, who had been the primary bread winner in the family, things just kind of fell apart. She ended up with no where to stay and is temporarily living at the Women's Shelter on Rosa Parks. She is grateful. She is grateful for a place to stay, for food, for her new Chucks. (check out those chucks!) I wanted her to write a small paragraph for you guys :)

She did have a long story and for some reason I feel selfish with it. (Sorry everyone!) After my hour or so with her, I would consider her a friend. We exchanged email addresses, added each other on Facebook and had a nice hug when her sister picked her up. God willing, 'S' is the exact type of teammate we'd love to add down the road at SSP.

One thing I can't stop thinking about is why we can't just slow down and talk to people. In the world I'm living right now, things are different. Granted I know I am experiencing only a small sample of what is really out there, but I cannot get over how easy people are to talk to. I've always take a bit of self pride in my ability and willingness to strike up conversation with someone; but looking back: I am not a good listener. I'm not an active listener. I'm not engaging or empathetic or honest in my conversation. God has guided me into some great situations and enabled me to be these things this week and I wouldn't trade what I've gained through that openness for anything.

Ok my first true challenge. It's easy. Talk to someone you would typically never talk to (doesn't have to be a homeless person!) Be engaging, sincere, honest, ask question and don't rush. Bet some of you learn something about yourself in doing so.

-Matt

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