"It's like battling the devil with both hands tied behind your back (addiction)." -John

"It's like battling the devil with both hands tied behind your back (addiction)." -John

January 19th

John has been 'houseless' for 10 years. John uses the term houseless because his home is in heaven with Jesus Christ.

This was a conversation I will remember for the rest of my life.

John comes across as funny, wise, caring, content, addicted and not afraid to share his faith. 10 years ago, his second wife left him. He found himself making $100,000 a year in the industrial freight industry with a big house he built himself, a nice truck, a boat and 3 kids. He was an addict then; something he has struggled with his whole life. When things got tough he turned to pills and LTD ('Last Two Dollars--a nickname for whiskey in this community) to end his life. By the grace of God it didn't land. John never even tried to move on, he struggled with depression and addiction and continues to.  Throughout everything he has been through he has never quit believing in Christ and his ultimate sacrifice for us. He has made an unfortunate decision that he cannot win on this earth and ever since has just been passing his time on this earth waiting.

John quoted, "Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes." James 4:14

This is a passage of scripture that many of us are familiar with, a cornerstone truth of our existence, but by no stretch of the imagination the end of the story. Jeremiah 29:11"For I know the plans I have for you," declares The Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." John will be the first to tell you he isn't living in his full potential for the Kingdom, but depression and addiction are a powerful tool of the devil.

John talked extensively about how there are wars fought on this earth big and small. But he feels sorry that most people don't realize they are living a part in a greater story, a greater war. John is aware of the spiritual battles he faces and that we all face. But he is confident this war is already won. For those of you that have kept up with this blog, you might find it interesting that the one book besides the Bible that I brought on this journey is 'Epic' by John Eldridge. This is what Eldridge is talking about. I am typing this baffled from the conversation I just had.

My heart aches that John has chosen to miss out on the joy, peace and hope God offers us in this life.

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Our conversation extended much further than religion. As a man with 10 solid years on the streets of Nashville, living the majority of the time outside, he offered some keen insights. I'll touch on some of these tomorrow, following a cup of coffee we are to have together in the morning :)

I almost didn't write this next part because it seems unbelievable. Our conversation took place down by the river about 200 yards from where I have slept 3 nights. When I asked John about where he was staying he said "Past the tracks by the river, but I just moved there. This is where I slept on my second night.

-Matt

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